“See the devil, he learns from your mistakes, even if you don’t, that’s how he keeps you in cycles, cycles” – Jonathan McReynolds, Cycles
I can remember a low point in my life, where I found myself asking God, “Why do I keep going through this? What is it about me that keeps attracting and embracing men who only cause pain? Then, I thought I finally broke the cycle only to find out 4 years later…I failed the test AGAIN!
At some point during my healing process, I realized the dysfunction and pain that contributed to my brokenness lead me to my purpose of empowering young girls and women to be the best version of themselves.
I don’t regret any of my relationships; although, I have had some of those, “what was I thinking moments?” Each relationship taught me a lesson but, more importantly, I grew from them.
At age 32 I have come to realize that life is like a video game. It has different levels, each with a conclusion that either enabled you to advance to the next level or repeat the current level. Each level has a different opponent, twists and turns, mountain top or valley. What I have come to realize is that each test/level you endure is not meant to hurt you but to test your areas of weakness so that you might learn from your weakness and be a better competitor. The level that you are currently on right now is just a test. It’s a test to build your character, increase your faith and guide you towards total Trust in Him.
“Didn’t I conquer this last year? Tell me what I missed ’cause I fear, that it’s coming back up again” – Jonathan McReynolds, Cycles
One of the most annoying things in life, is thinking you know something but clearly you don’t because you keep repeating the same toxic cycles. For some women, it’s getting in and out of toxic relationships, mismanagement of your financial resources, or poor nutrition choices. Like, I know I’m a diabetic but it’s just something about that Snickerdoodle bread pudding at Flight American Fusion, that just causes me to forget my AC1 # was sky high at my last doctors’ appointment. I know I should just let go but, his love is so overwhelming. I know I need to pay my electric bill but there is this sale at Macy’s….Cycles.
“This will end like I want it to, I win. The enemy will have to lose again. See, I’m a different fighter now. And I have God to thank” – Jonathan McReynolds, Cycles
Accountable is one thing very few people want to be held. I found myself asking God, “What am I supposed to do?” And the answer was so simple, “Seek Me.” I realized I was focused on the wrong relationship. As Maya Angelou once said, “A woman’s heart should be so hidden in God that a man has to seek Him to find it.” Don’t allow someone to make you feel like you are hard to love. God loved you so much he died on a cross, so a man should be able to handle your aggressiveness and appreciate the productivity in brings.
My cycle may be totally different from yours but, we all go through cycles. Some of us are financially damaged, you could make more than your parents and grandparents combined and still be living paycheck to paycheck, because there is an area of our life that needs attention. The issue is not that we have cycles, the problem is that we don’t confront it so that we can learn the lesson and move on to the next level.
Don’t allow your cycle to become your excuse as to why you can’t reach your purpose. God’s strength is made perfect in our weakness. You have to hold yourself accountable for finding out what area of your life needs to be healed so that you can walk in your purpose. Some people are just busy doing things, but they aren’t walking in their purpose. For some it’s out of fear of having to relive an uncomfortable time of their life for others it could be out of ignorance. Whatever the reason is, know that there is a reason you endured what you did. Your life is not your own.
Your next level has to be more important to you than your pride. Sometimes you have to let your pride aside and connect with someone who can help you reach your next level. In order to break your toxic cycles, you need to get to the root of why you choose self-sabotaging behavior over passing the test. Why haven’t you gone to a therapist to deal with your issues that cause you to seek love in the wrong men? Why not write a personal budget to keep your personal finances balanced? Why not work out regularly and take better care of your temple.
It’s ok to put your pride aside and focus on your growth.
Are you going to learn from your mistakes in order to pass the test in breaking cycles?https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Eu2aYgWmVA